Are we just going a tad overboard?

by todaystrainingblog

February 22, 2013

                 Our Kids aren’t being allowed to be kids anymore. They can’t play any of the games that they want to. The main reason is that they are scared that they’ll be suspended and it’ll go on their permanent record!

                I’m talking about little boys playing cowboys & Indians, army, or cops & robbers! These elementary school kids can’t even pretend to shoot the bad guys at school! These are games that kids have played for centuries! And now along with other forms of exhaustive exercise at recess or before/after school, it’s been banned or told it’s bad!

                I understand that the connotation to administrators and teachers, and some parents that it’s encouraging kids to grab a firearm and take care of a problem! Nothing could be further from the truth! We as a society are over analyzing it!

                Here is an article from Washington D.C. about kids being suspended, detained, and just being punished for being kids;


                                Finger Guns, Toy Guns and Threats: The Fallout of Sandy Hook

The Washington Post


Schools around the Washington, D.C., area are increasing security measures and tightening disciplinary actions in the wake of the Dec. 14 shooting massacre at Sandy Hook Elementary School in Newtown, Conn. School officials in the region have become increasingly sensitive about threats, intruders, and guns, and some children have found themselves in detention or placed on suspension for behavior that most consider playful.

An 8-year-old boy in Prince William County, Va., was recently suspended for pointing his finger like a gun at another student while allegedly playing “cowboys and Indians.” School officials suspended the child for “threatening to harm self or others.” Parents worry their children might have their permanent records marred by infractions stemming from simple childhood antics.

 Judith Browne Dianis, the co-director of the Advancement Project, a civil rights organization that works on the school violence issue nationally, said schools were in the process of increasing disciplinary measures. “Clearly, we’re post-Newtown,” she said. “We’re seeing more school districts rushing to hire more police, and we’re seeing a rise in the number of incidents of school discipline that puts common sense to the side.” While school officials agree there is increased awareness of potentially violent acts, they maintain good judgment is being exercised when evaluating such acts.


School administrators have eliminated dodge-ball because it’s too dangerous. The same goes for tag or freeze tag. They ban keeping score to stop kids from feeling inferior. We stop teachers from failing kids and holding them back. We tell these ‘lil angels’ that they are good and just try your best’ and everything will be okay! Nothing could be further from the truth. We need to teach our kids to fail. We need to show them that there are losers and winners in life. They need to know that people do keep score. Kids need to work off excess energy. And yet what do we do? We tell them no it’s bad.

We wonder why we have a generation of kids who are lazy and can’t finish their jobs. Or why they aren’t employable? Or why they get so easily upset and frustrated when things don’t go their way. And why they have such over whelming rage. The answer is simple. We don’t tell them that it’s okay to fail. We don’t teach them how to Faial. And as parents we hover around and are always there to tell them that everyone is against them when they do fail!

We wonder why there is an increase in violence in both schools and the workplace. And I’m not talking about the use of firearms, although that is certainly a part of it. This is the reason why there is so much violence in those places! There are other reasons as well, of course. But to be perfectly honest, the majority of the blame falls squarely on the shoulders of the parents. Parents need to do several things to prevent this violence. It’s the same thing that my wife told my mother when she visited me for the first after I went blind.

Clearly and with love, she said ‘Stand up. Put your hands on your butt. Now sit back down’. After the natural quizzical look, she explained to my well intentioned mother. ‘He’ll never learn to do things if someone else continually does them for him!’  So, stop ‘molly-coddling’ our kids. Let them fail and let them play. If they show signs of being violent – any of the 15 warning signs of SV – then do something. But otherwise, shut the hell up and lets kids be kids.